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Nine things, chosen carefully.

We earn a commission on most products listed below. We chose them anyway. The nine products on this page replaced fifty-three. The other forty-four are listed at the bottom under “We won’t recommend.”

09 · Card decks$25

We’re Not Really Strangers

by WNRS

150 questions across three levels: perception, connection, reflection. Less clinical than ours, more playful. We recommend it for couples in the first two years; the BothWant library is the better fit at year five and beyond.

The card deck for the first two years.

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What we won’t recommend

The 44 things we considered and rejected, summarized.

  • 01

    Couples-counseling apps that promise progress in 7 days.

    Progress is not the unit. Conversation is.

  • 02

    Anything with the word “spice” in the marketing copy.

    Desire is not a seasoning.

  • 03

    Question decks with “intimacy levels” unlocked by points.

    Gamification of vulnerability is a category error.

  • 04

    Books with the word “masculine” or “feminine” in the title.

    Almost always selling something other than what the title implies.

  • 05

    Most weekend retreats over $1,000.

    Save the money. See a therapist for ten sessions instead.